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EXCERPT FROM THE BOOK:
VINCE'S GYM
Neo
talks about love and romance
Once I asked Neo what he thought the nature of love and romance
was. I also wanted to know if there was a difference between the
two.
Neo looked up
at my questions as he was eating a blood orange with childlike
delight.” The juice was running down his chin. He was eating the
red succulent fleshy part of the fruit by peeling it away from
the outer peel with his large teeth. When he had finished the
last of the flesh with greedy satisfaction, instead of throwing
away the peels, he threw these into his mouth with
indiscriminate zeal.
He saw the
startled look on my face, smiled and said, “Waste not, want not
I always say.”
“Aren’t those
bad for you,” I asked?
“He said, “Na,
no worries, no pesticides were used and I scrubbed the peels.”
Neo said,
“What do you think?”
“I was taught
that the peels were bad for you,” I said.
Neo chuckled,
“No, I mean what do you think about love and romance?”
I was still
stuck on the fact that he was eating orange peels.
I said, “Are
you telling me that the only reason you’re eating them is
because they are not bad for you?”
Neo laughed
showing his prominent teeth as he still had a mouthful of orange
and peel rolling around as he said, “Well my people are taught
that if it ain’t bad fer ya just eat it, or make use of it
somehow.” “Actually orange peels can be good fer ya.” “Orange
peels help ta reduce the livers over production of endogenous
bad cholesterol.”
My jaw must
have looked as if it dropped to the carpet because he started to
choke on his blessed orange peels while he laughed.
Neo said with
exaggerated exasperation, “What?”
I said, “You’re
a regular Mr. Science you are!” “Where in the hell do you come
up with all of that shit?”
He coughed up
the bothersome pieces in his throat and then he said, “Ah, ya
know I read the “Woman’s Home Journal.” We both laughed at this.
“I just like to
read and research a lot Vinny,” Neo admitted.
“Well bottom
line, do the peels taste good,” I asked?
Neo tossed me
an orange and he leaned his head toward me and said, “Try it.”
“Now answer my question.” “What do you think about love
and romance?”
Rolling around the
plump orange in both hands I pondered his question, “Shit,
sometimes I hate when you answer questions with questions,” I
said.
Neo just smiled
as he stretched his rangy frame, “Well people learn best when
they can answer their own questions.”
I had been starving
and I tore into the orange without tasting it. I had tore into
it with such gusto that I had juice smeared all over my face and
I felt silly as I said, “Oh uh…I think love is just a word for a
biological process.”
Neo said, “Just
a biological process or could it be a feeling that causes
biological synapses ta register?
“Is this a
‘what came first the chicken or the egg’ kind of question,” I
asked?
“Indeed it is,
“Neo said.
I said, “I
think what we call love is a mechanism that insures survival of
the species.”
Neo said, “Do
animals feel love?”
I said, “I
don’t think they do.” “I think humans create concepts and ideas
and attach them to sexual drives and we call this love.”
Neo said, “You
think this is needed to insure procreation?
“I think so,” I
said.
Neo said, “But
ya just said animals don’t feel love.” “Obviously the sex drive
of animals is enough to ensure procreation.”
“Hmm, I see
your point,” I mused. “Okay…love is a biological mechanism to
insure that the families stay together.” “That the males of our
species will stay with the females to help them to care for the
offspring and still have an available female for steady sex.”
Neo said,
“There are lots of animals where the male participates with the
protection of the family and rearing of the offspring, and the
males often do this without the benefit of sexual convenience.”
I thought,
“Damn it, that’s right.” “I guess humans are just wired
differently,” I said.
“Neo said, “In
fact…humans according to you are much more likely to desert
their offspring than many of the animals that are documented to
stay with their mates and offspring.” “Humans are much more
likely to engage in infidelity and infanticide much more often
than the higher mammals and birds that tend to their families.”
I said, “So I
guess that love may be an emotion unique to humans but felt and
demonstrated by only some humans.”
Neo tossed me
another blood orange and he commenced to tear open another with
his teeth. I followed his example.
In between
bites, smacking sounds, and licking the sticky juice off of his
fingers Neo said, “Perhaps love is something that many animals
feel, especially as their brains git bigger.” “Perhaps the more
complex an organism’s brain the more intricate the peripheral
emotions.” Neo tilted his head as he looked at me and said,
“Also the more complex the organism, the more intricate the
concepts that are perhaps attached to the energy of love.”
I was perplexed
at the puzzle as to why humans were less dependable than many of
the higher mammals to care for their young, and I voice my
bewilderment to Neo.
Neo said,
“Animals do not have the powerful intellect that humans do to
deceive themselves.” “For example: Other higher animals, such as
primates, dolphins and other “smart’ animals are capable of
deception.”
Neo starts to
eat the peel of the other blood orange with ill-disguised
relish, he said, “But they engage in only the deception of other
animals.” “Their instincts keep them right in line to operate in
the most effective manner for their survival.” “Animals can’t
afford self-deception -- it goes against optimal survival
protocol.”
I chewed on
both Neo’s explanation and the orange -- tasting the tanginess
or the peel releasing its natural chemicals in the air. I
mentioned this odd taste of the oranges in the air and so I
asked, “Okay Mr. Science what is in the orange that is causing
this non-sweet taste that I feeling in the air with my tongue?”
Without batting
an eyelash Neo rattles off, “Could be that yer tasting the high
concentrations of citric acid, or the alkaloid
synephrine, or citral which is a volitile oil, or
limonene a type of lipid, and a few polyphenols such
as cyanidin, dephinidin, and tangeretin.”
We both laughed
at his humorous answer… it was so over the top.
I felt I had to show
off to Neo what little nutritional knowledge I had been learning
at Lane Community College, so I said, “Leave to you to turn a
simple question into a complex answer.” “Most people would have
simply said, ‘I don’t know’, or at best say fructose, or the
carotenoids beta-carotene, zeaxanthin, or lutein.” “But oh no,
not you… you got to bring up lots of hundred dollar words that
practically no one has heard before,” I laughed hard as I
finished my lecture.
Neo had a look
of mock contrition on his face and he said, “Well ya wanted to
know what you tasted in the air… ya did not ask what nutrients
were in the bloody orange.”
Still laughing
I half kidded, “You probably made those words up on the spot.”
Neo said, “Ya
can check the info fer yerself at the library if you do not
believe me.”
I could tell he
didn’t care whether I believed him or not and I thought he
figured that I would check on those words anyways.”
I said, “Okay…
but I’m going to have to ask you to write those words down for
me… I can’t spell them much less remember them.”
(At the end of
our talk, he did write them down and of course I did check to
see if those words existed – and sure enough they did and they
are found in many types of citrus fruits, -- the smug bastard!)
Neo dared me to
eat the peels that I had piled at my side. I did and much to my
surprise they were not bad. I would not prefer the skin to the
fleshy part of the orange as I am prone to do with fried
chicken… but it wasn’t bad.
Slurping as I
spoke, “If humans have greater intellects which is the source of
both good and bad things, why do we make the decision to bypass
sensible instincts and involve ourselves with self-deception?”
Neo said,
“Humans get caught up in emotional drama.” “They are socialized
to put all sorts of odd values on things and these often
conflict with optimal survival protocols.” “As individuals,
humans unlike animals will even have conflicting values and this
causes them to have tendencies towards operating, no…suffering
from psychological or cognitive dissonance.” “You and I don’t
need to look far to find examples of this phenomena.” “Both of
us need only to look at some of the members within our families
to see that this is true.”
I sighed and
said, “Boy and howdy on that one partner.”
Neo said, “Both
of our fathers and other family members suffered from conflicts
of their values and desires.”
“If you were ta ask
either of our fathers why they left their families to their own
devices they would have a slew full of rational sounding but in
essence irrational reasons for their behavior.”
“I said, “The
logical reason was that they were being very selfish.” “They
wanted what they wanted, when they wanted it.”
Neo looked more
intense and he lean in further as he made his point saying, “Yes
in essence, at their core that is correct.” “But with humans it
is a trickier than that.” Animals want what they want, when they
want… but they do not deceive themselves with elaborate stories
to rationalize and justify their behavior.” “Animals do not
create dissonance with in their operating systems.” They simply
act with the most effective survival protocol that works the
best for their species.” Neo said, “When a survival protocol is
no longer useful, the animals will adapt or die out.”
I said, “It
seems to me that cognitive dissonance is highly maladaptive.”
Neo tilted his
head as if he was wondering if I was going to catch on to where
he was going.
He said,
“Indeed it is very maladaptive.”
“Why is it that
we haven’t become extinct,” I asked?
Neo eyes
gleamed with predatory zest as he said, “Who says that were not
on the fast track to extinction?”
I said, “Well
how did we managed to last this long?”
Neo said, “In
geological time, or naturalistic time for that matter, we
haven’t been on the planet near as long as other animals;
especially the animals that have not been tainted by their
exposure to us.” “We have lasted only this meager amount of time
because our intellectual part of our brain does allow us to
brute and compensate our way through and past our screw ups.”
“Sort of like the way that you brute yer way through a judo
match against an opponent that has more skill than you.” “By
compensating with the brute force of yer strength over a skilled
opponent ya git the job done now… but in the future a skilled
opponent with yer strength or an opponent so highly skilled yer
brute strength will not be able to help you.” “This is how
humans as a species tend ta operate, by using the brute strength
of their intellect to by pass easier more logical survival
protocols.”
I was getting
antsy and since I could see what he was getting out I still
wanted the original question I asked answered so I said, “I want
to know the bottom line… is their really such a thing as true
love.”
Neo sighed and
smile as he turned out his big palms in a gesture of ‘ya got
me.’
He said, “That
is one of the mysteries of the Universe mate.” “Let me ask ya…
do you think yer mother loved you?”
I answered
without hesitation, “Yes, definitely.”
How do you
know,” Neo asked?
I said,
“Because she sacrificed so much for us when she could have left
us.” “She went beyond the minimum required by law or social
convention.”
Neo eyes turned
inward as he slowing said, “Do you think yer father loves you?”
Without
hesitation I said, “No.” “That is so unlikely.”
Why do you say
that,” Neo asked?
I said,
“Because my dad without reservation or guilt left our family to
our own devices when it would have been no real sacrifice on his
part to mentor us or at the very least to send some money to my
mother to insure that we would eat, or have our health cared
for.” “He could have easily done this if he was concerned about
us not going hungry.” “My dad made so much money back then… it
would not have put a dent in his finances.” “He still would have
had plenty of money to party and chase whores.”
Neo said, “Ya
sound bitter mate.”
I said, “Well,
it does frustrate me and his actions perplexes me when I think
about it.” “But aside from that I believe that if my dad loved
me… he would not have been able to bear the thought of his
children going hungry.”
Neo said, “So
you think that with love… if there is such a thing for the sake
of argument—has to do with sacrifice?”
I said, “Yes,
sometimes I think it does.” “It’s funny though… my dad would
have tears in his eyes when he talked to us, telling us how much
he loved us and how much he missed us.” “My relatives would tell
me that my dad cried and suffered many times.” “As a kid, I
always wondered if it wasn’t just an act that my dad was putting
on for us and his other family members.” “I still wonder about
that.”
I heard Neo
make a sharp inhalation noise that sounded heartfelt and as he
breathed out slowly, sadly he said, “Perhaps yer dad was only
acting…which would sadly indicate he is a narcissist and perhaps
has some socio-pathic tendencies.” “I suspect however, that yer
dad is only a narcissist and suffers from many internal
mechanisms that cause him to suffer cognitive dissonance.” “Yer
dad is not operating with the most effective survival or social
protocols.”
I felt
impatient and said, “Whatever!” “Regardless of the reasons are
it does our family little good.”
Neo said, “I
notice ya read a book written by a mate of mine, it’s called “The
Road Less Traveled”.
I said, “Hell,
you know him also?”
Neo said, “I
know him… I studied under him.” “I don’t want ta go into all of
that now, but I want you to tell me what he says about love.”
“Can you remember the different types of love?”
I breathed in
feeling anxious as I often do when I am being tested.
I said, “Okay…
here goes.” “Dr. Peck said that there is a father’s and mother’s
love for their children, Arthurian love or romantic love, the
love of your fellow humans, erotic love, Platonic love, God’s
love for creation or the love of God by some humans and finally
self-love”
Neo said,
“Without hesitation you said yer mother loves you?”
“Yes,” I said.
Neo asked, “Do
you believe that some father’s love their children the way your
mother loves you?”
Thinking of Mr.
Mullen, Mr. Aberant, Mr. Burns, Mr. Matz and Mr. Harcelrode and
my Uncle Lee, Uncle Pip and my Godfather I said, “Yes.”
“Do you believe
that some people feel very romantic and knightly in regards to
how they interact with other people,” Neo asked?
I thought of
Angelina and a few other men and women that I knew so I said,
“Yes.”
Neo tilted his
head as he plopped another slice of blood orange in his mouth
and as he chewed he spoke, “Do you believe that friends could
sacrifice and love each other and not just friends that people
can actually just love other humans and sacrifice for them?”
I thought about
my friends and how at times that I felt a pure non-conditional
love for humanity. I thought of all the times that I have
sacrificed for some of my friends and how some of them have
sacrificed for me. I thought of the times that I had put my life
on the line for my fellow Marine or for a total stranger.
I said, “Yes.”
Neo smiled and
said, “Have ya ever felt erotic love?”
I laughed and
said, “Oh boy howdy!” “More often than I can count.”
“Do you think
people are capable of feeling all of those types of love
separately and in some cases towards one of more people?”
I said, “Yes…
now that you mention it. I think some of us could be capable of
it.” “I know that I would like to think that one day I would be
capable of feeling that way with all the women that I feel
erotic love with.” “I would like to feel that way with most of
the women I feel Platonic love for.”
Neo said, “Do
you remember what else Dr. Peck said, about love?”
I had to admit
that I had drawn a blank on remembering anything else from his
book concerning love.
Neo said, “Dr.
Peck has stated that love is hard to quantify, but his best
definition of love is when you put another person’s well being
and spiritual growth ahead of yer needs.” “This does not imply
being a martyr or a door mat, or a sick obsessive enabler.” “For
example, if you are feeling extraordinarily randi fer some
Shelia, and ya want ta rut with her in the worst way… but ya
know that her spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical
well-being would be better off if ya refrain from rutting with
her; and if ya refrained from rutting with her because you cared
more about her well being in any of the areas I described that
would be a fine example of sacrifice because of true love.”
I mumbled, “I
must admit that’s not my usual method of operating.” “I do let
the woman know that where I am coming from and that I am not the
type of guy she should be investing all of her hopes and dreams
on corralling.” “At least I am straight forward in that way.” ”I
figure that once forewarned all is fair.”
Neo made an odd
face and said, “Well at least that’s a sight better than what
most blokes do.” “Vinny, on one level ya seem like ya want to
love a woman in all the ways imaginable and ya seem like ya
crave to be loved in all the ways imaginable.”
I was getting
extremely uncomfortable with the direction Neo was going. I did
not want to pursue this line of questioning, but I felt I must
explain myself to him.
I said, “Sure
sometimes I think I want that.” I certainly don’t think I could
get involved with a woman long-term if I didn’t feel erotic love
for her, regardless if I loved her in all the other ways
possible.” “Besides even though I feel like I believe in all of
those areas of love… I think I am incapable of being in a
monogamous love relationship.” “I may be incapable of love
period.”
Why do you say
that,” Neo asked?
I said,
“Because no matter how loving the women I have been with… no
matter how beautiful they are… no matter how great sex is with
them – I still find myself lusting for other women.”
Neo starts
laughing uncontrollably. When his convulsions minimized he said
in a perfect President Carter drawl, “Oh lord, I have lusted
in my heart.” “I hope God forgives my lustful heart.” He has
more spasms. Finally he says, “Just because ya lust fer other
women ya think yer incapable of being monogamous?” “Vinny, yer a
man…it is not a real problem if ya just feel lust, as long as
yer in charge of yer pecker and not vice versa.”
“I’m afraid
that I am too much like all the men in my family,” I bemoaned.
“I sometimes feel like I am a slave to my chubby.”
Neo looked
solemn, “Sexual addiction can be a problem… it can ruin ya.”
“Chasing lots of Shelias will keep from getting commitment, and
it will foster a greater need for sexual release.” “This can eat
up a lot of valuable time that you could be evolving in other
areas.”
I was feeling
defensive again and I said, “I have tried to go the monogamous
route, but once you do that women will often start pushing for
marriage.”
Neo cluck his
tongue in mock pity, “What is wrong with a woman wanting
commitment?”
Flustered to
the point of anger, I said, “Look…I can handle commitment; but
every time the women I have been with start thinking I am
willing to commit they start changing the rules on you.” “If you
tell them that you don’t want kids and the white picket fence
for the first five to ten years they start to pull the emotional
blackmail crap.”
Instead of
consoling me for my woes, Neo looked supremely amused by my
whining, he said, “Oh what do ya mean by blackmailing?”
I said, “Well
for example, it goes something like this; first the woman will
say she is happy to have you no matter what.” “Then the woman
will say, I want to get married within the year and have kids.”
“Then the woman says, if you really loved me you won’t want us
to move away from the area, because my folks live here.” “If you
loved me, you will understand why I want to have kids as soon as
possible.” “Lots of shit like that,” I said,
“I just did not
want to be like one of the many poor slobs that I work with.” “I
cannot count the number of men that I talked to whose wives got
pregnant right after the wedding despite all the promises made
that they would wait to have kids.”
I was on a rant
now, I said, “You can trust them to take birth control and hope
that they don’t ‘accidentally’ forget to take their
pills.” “If you decide to wear condoms in conjunction with the
rhythm method they often bitch that they don’t like the condoms
or not being spontaneous.”
Neo was
continuing to good naturally mock my whining fest with a studied
long- suffering look on his face.
He said, “Did
you ever think of getting a vasectomy?”
Now it was my
turn to give Neo a long suffering look – not entirely mock, I
said, “Even though the women I have been with whined about the
idea…I actually shopped around for a doctor that would do the
operation.”
“They all
refused me when I was nineteen, and they refused me when I was
twenty five.” “They all keep telling me to wait until I am
older.”
Neo starts to
make noises like Louie Armstrong, “Hmm mmm mmhg.” “Doctors are
afraid of lawsuits. “There have been lots of cases where men
have regretted their decision to get a vasectomy and have sued
their doctors for not considering their young ages.”
“Yeah that and
because in their hearts those doctors would resent guys like me
having all of that uninhibited fun,” I said half jokingly.
Neo laughed,
“Perhaps yer right.” “You could get a vasectomy over seas.”
“Someplace in Europe, New Zealand or Australia.” “Doctors in
other countries don’t have the lawsuit problems that doctors in
the States have, and they are less worried about foreigners.”
“I have never
thought of that,” I said, my spirits were starting to lift over
this prospect.”
“You don’t ever
want to have kids,” Neo asked?
I said, “I
figure that I will be ready to have kids when I experience life
a little more and get financially stable.”
“I figure I
would adopt a kid.” “I could love a kid regardless if it came
from my loins or not.”
Neo said
solemnly, “I believe you could Vinny.” “At any rate, finding
love and romance with one or more people who share the same
goals and values – that you can also trust is rare indeed.”
In a tongue and
cheek manner I said, “When I was ten… before I became the
wonderful sexual being that you see in front you now, I read a
wonderful book that would solve a lot of problems.”
Neo snorted and
affected an East Indian accent, “Oh please oh wondrous sexual
being that I see blessing me with your presence, pray tell what
book of wisdom that you would promote to change the world.”
“Please Sahib, oh pray tell will you bless me with such
wondrous knowledge.”
“Ok, ok, enough
with the sarcasm Hajji – the book is written by Robert
Heinlein and it is called “Stranger in a Strange Land.” “I
thought it would be great if everyone in the world could live
this way…without hate, or jealousy.”
Neo said, “Ya
like the idea of a communal family unit do ya?”
I said, “Yeah
it would be great – all of the men and women sharing love and
sex with each other.” The people that wanted to have kids would
have them and share the responsibilities and people that did not
want to have kids also share the responsibilities.” “This way,
people could pool their resources of money, food, time, and
skills.” “It could be worked out that if someone wanted or
needed to get away for awhile it could be done.”
Neo indulged me
with a knowing smile, he said, “I have lived in communes in a
variety of cultures.”
I looked at him
dying to hear about all of the sexual orgies.
He said,
“Communal life rarely works, especially when the sharing of sex
partners comes into play.” “Especially when a culture or a
society gets more complex – when people in cultures become more
materialistic and product oriented.”
I was very
naive` back then, much more than I am now. I just couldn’t
conceive as to why what I thought was such a potentially
superior way to live would not stay and as said as much to Neo.
Neo smiled a
secret and said, “Because the majority of humans are lazy,
practice self deception and they suffer from the green-eyed
monster of jealousy.”
I defensively
said, “I am not jealous.”
Neo said, “No
your not.” But most people are because at their core they don’t
like other people as having more, being perceived as being more
attractive, they don’t like to be compared sexually or
otherwise.” “People also fear abandonment.”
I said, “Well I
can understand the last part to a degree, but I don’t understand
the other stuff.” “What frustrates me is that most women,
particularly the women I have been with think that jealousy, and
covetousness is natural and therefore good or at least is to be
accepted.” “Most men I know like the idea of having lots of girl
friends but they do not like it when the shoe is on the other
foot.”
Neo pulls out a
bag of Brazil nuts and he pushes over a pile of them towards me.
He puts one in his mouth and with the force and precision he
easily breaks open the shell. I felt my teeth ache at the sight
of him biting the nuts like I would M and M’s. I could do the
same since my teeth were strong, but I was approached the biting
with a delicate tentativeness.” I would not attempt to break
anything harder than a peanut shell nowadays.”
I looked at the
Brazil nuts and I thought, “I wonder… and I said, “Bet
you can’t tell me all of the nutrients in Brazil nuts.”
Neo was just
about to but a the meaty kernel of a large nut that he had just
crack from his strong teeth back into his mouth but my
challenged caused him to pause and he said, without batting an
eye, “Mmm, then ya would accuse me of being a show-off.”
“Ah ha, I
shouted, yer just a one trick wonder…just like Harry,” I
scorned. I knew he didn’t want to show off, so I thought I could
goad him into performing for me, after all it works on most
people.
Neo laughed and
said, “Save the adolescent reverse psychology fer someone like
Harry.”
I laughed and
started with the mock whining, “Please, please, oh pretty please
Mr. Science.”
Neo said, “This
little beauty is chock full high amounts of methionine,
some arginine, cysteine, glutamic acid
which of course are amino acids, and then it has the fatty acids
such as linoleic acid, myristic asid,
oleic acid, alpha-linolenic acid, stearic
acid and very high amounts of palmitic acid.”
“Would ya like to hear about the vitamins and minerals mate?”
I laughed and
said, “Just the ones in high amounts.”
“Well Vinny,
Neo says in his best Mr. Science voice, the Brazil nut is very
high in lots of minerals such as potassium, and
phosphorus and fair amount of calcium and
magnesium, and a respectable amount of selenium.”
“The wonderful Brazil nut is natures fine way to prevent
various forms of cancer because in addition ta all of these
wonderful nutrients the Brazil nut also contain ellagic
acid and this acid, in conjunction with selenium are the
key ingredients that are crucial for protecting the body against
many cancers.”
His imitation
of Mr. Science was really funny. You had to be there.
I said, “No
doubt you will write these nutrients down so that I can check
the nutritional composition tables at school.
Neo said,
“Sure, and if you want to check on the references that show that
the wonderful Brazil nuts cancer fighting properties, ya can
check the British Journal of Nutrition.”
“Could you give
me the month and year of the publication,” I mocked?
“Na, but it was
published before 1981,” Neo volunteered. “Now let me back ta my
wonderful Brazil nuts.”
“Now where the
hell were we before yer attention wandered off?”
I said, “I
mentioned that most guys liked the idea of having sex with lots
of women, but not vice versa.”
As he swallowed
the nut Neo took time to pause and said, “Yeah guys are big on
trying out communal life style as long as they can live like
Sheiks with a harem.” “They would prefer to keep all the men
around them eunuchs.”
“Neo said, “By
the way, yer lady friends are right jealousy and covetous
feelings and behaviors are natural, for primates.”
As I was
chewing my mouthful of Brazil nuts I was pondering as to why
communes failed.”
“If people had
the drive to start communes and could see the benefits for them,
why aren’t they advanced enough to keep the communes
sustainable,” I asked”
Now Neo was
lustily chowing down the nuts at a faster pace. Normally Neo ate
in what I would call a slow methodical and reverent pace. Today
he seemed like a man on a mission.
Neo said,
“There are lots of reasons, some good, and some bad.” “A lot of
people like the concept that Robert Heinlein presented in his
book.” “You have to remember that he wrote about a concept, an
ideal.” True to most people’s nature they want to bench seven
hundred pounds right from the git go; they want to skip
evolution.”
“They want to skip
all of the hard work that it would take to achieve the level of
growth to be able to live in such an environment.” “They want to
start from the top.” “This is one of the biggest flaws of the
human primate.”
I felt a sense
of pleasure that Neo referred to most people as human primates.
I guess because I had been doing just that since I was a child,
even though at times I recognized and admitted that I too was a
primate.”
“Hearing the
consensus of perception in this matter from Neo’s lips, I at
least felt like a more clever primate.
I said, “It’s
the sexual jealousy and comparison thing, isn’t it?” I had to
quickly get in the fact that I never suffered from the fear of being
sexually compared.
Neo eyes glowed with
amusement at my last assertion and he said, “Do you think yer a
better lover than most people?”
I said with all
the humility that I felt, “No… I just don’t see any reason to
worry and dwell on if I am or not.” “I usually managed to give
lovemaking my best effort.” “I also realize that everyone has
different taste.” “Some people only like hamburgers, other
people only like filet’ mingon, and some people like to sample a
variety of things.”
“I realize that I cannot be all things to all women.” “It’s best
to have other men and women to share the task.” “But most people
do not like to be compared sexually and they are sexually
possessive.”
Neo still looked amused, “It sounds like you have given this a
lot of thought.”
“Just every day of my life,” I thought.
Neo said, “Actually many communes degenerate not because of the
sex thing.”
“But because there are often disagreements as to who is pulling
their weight and who is not concerning the labors of the commune
that needs to be delegated and shared.” “Also, eventually some
people realize that communal life is not for them.” “Some people
prefer monogamy and not because they fall prey to jealousy.”
“For many people, monogamy is simpler, and more effective for
their lives in many respects.”
I said, “That’s
cool, if that’s what people prefer then so be it.” “I just think
that communes are better in fostering more ease of living and
more effective and intense spiritual growth.”
Neo was looking
more amused by the minute as he continued to chomp on his nuts.
Neo said, “So you have experience living in a commune?”
I puffed up my
chest in defense and pride and told him of my Key West
experience.”
Neo said, “Having a day ta day daisy chain with a handful of
Shelias is not the same thing.” “Also Vinny, It is easier for
people to attain spiritual attainment in a monogamous
relationship than in a communal environment.”
I said, “What
do you mean?”
Neo paused on
his consumption of the nuts and leaned in intently and said,
“When you are in love with one woman and ya put all of yer all
into just that woman… it is easier fer the both of yer nervous
systems to resonate and then merge and intertwine.” “This is the
zenith of love and sex.” “For most people having only one love
interest to focus on and that person on you is the alpha – the
beginning of spiritual ecstasy and the omega – the end or final
point of when the both of ya merge.” “It is the most blissful
experience that two people can experience together, especially
while engaging in the sexual act.”
I said, “Can’t
this be learned in a commune with many partners?”
Neo said, “It’s
possible, but ya tend ta have yer attention and energies
scattered. “ “You can’t start at the top.”
Other
Stories that touch on the subject of love are:
THE
NATURE OF LOVE
&
WHAT IS THE NATURE OF LOVE?
Other
Stories that touch on the subject of love are:
Neo Talks About Love and Romance
- A story from my Book 'VINCE'S GYM'
THE
UNWORTHY WOMAN
WOMEN OF WORTH
REMARKABLE WOMEN
often RUIN MEN
WHAT MAKES A PERSON WORTHY OF LOVE?
MOST PEOPLE TALK BULLSHIT:
One Primate's Search for
Intelligent Life: (GENESIS)
MOST PEOPLE TALK BULLSHIT:
One Primate's Search For Intelligent Life
(EXODUS)
MOST PEOPLE TALK BULLSHIT:
One Primate's Search For Intelligent Life
(REVELATIONS)
MOST PEOPLE TALK BULLSHIT:
One Primate's Search For Intelligent Life
(JUDGMENT DAY)
ADVENTURES IN MARINE BIOLOGY
THE MARINES: GOD'S CHOSEN
WARRIORS
CONVERSATIONS WITH NEO
NEO TEACHES ME THE ART OF WAR
& PEACE;
His Version of The Matrix
MEMORIES OF MY FATHERS
ZEN & THE ART OF RESISTANCE
TRAINING:
A Yogic & Scientific Approach To Weight
Lifting
ZEN & THE BIOLOGY OF
TRANSCENDENCE:
The First Matrix of Psychic
Phenomena
ZEN & THE ART OF KINESIOLOGY:
The Yogic & Scientific
Approach To Movement
ZEN & YOUR ENERGY SYSTEMS
ZEN & VARIOUS ASPECTS OF
TRAINING
HOMEPAGE TO VINCE'S GYM
HOMEPAGE |
